Family · Updated Oct 2026
My elderly parent needs help managing things
While your parent can still understand and decide, they can sign a durable power of attorney for money and a health care directive naming someone they trust; no court is needed. If they can no longer understand what they're signing, the family may need a court guardianship or conservatorship. Federal benefits like Social Security and VA have their own systems for managing someone's benefits.
This plan is general legal information, not legal advice. RobinClaim is not a law firm. Laws and deadlines change and have exceptions: check with the official source or a lawyer or legal aid office about your own case.
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Choose your state and answer 3 quick questions. The plan below changes as you answer: steps that don't fit your answers are hidden, and your state's deadlines appear. It all happens in your browser. Nothing is sent, and the page address holds only your answers.
Your plan
Do now
If you answered “Yes” to “Do you think someone is taking advantage of or hurting your parent?”
If your parent is in danger or being abused or exploited, call 911 or report to your local Adult Protective Services (find it through the Eldercare Locator, 1-800-677-1116).
Why: APS investigates abuse, neglect and financial exploitation of older adults.
If you answered “Yes / Sometimes / not sure” to “Can your parent still understand and make decisions?”
Talk with your parent about what help they want and who they trust. Let them lead.
Why: A power of attorney must be your parent's own choice.
Make a list of their accounts, income, bills, insurance and doctors.
Why: You can't help manage what you can't find.
Nothing extra here for your answers.
This week
If you answered “Yes / Sometimes / not sure” to “Can your parent still understand and make decisions?”
Have your parent sign a durable financial power of attorney and a health care directive (proxy) using your state's form, with the witness or notary steps your state requires.
Why: 'Durable' means it keeps working if they later lose capacity; without one, a court case may be needed.
Read the CFPB's free guides for agents under a power of attorney, guardians and representative payees.
Why: They explain your legal duties: keep money separate, keep records, act only in their interest.
If you answered “Yes” to “Does your parent get Social Security, SSI or VA benefits?”
For Social Security or SSI, contact Social Security about becoming representative payee. For VA benefits, contact the VA fiduciary program.
Why: These agencies don't accept a power of attorney to manage benefit payments.
If you answered “No” to “Can your parent still understand and make decisions?”
If your parent can no longer decide, ask the probate or county court about guardianship or conservatorship, and about less restrictive options.
Why: Only a court can give someone authority over an adult who can't consent.
Nothing extra here for your answers.
If it's not resolved
Give copies of the power of attorney to banks, doctors and insurers, and ask each about their own forms.
Why: Banks may review the document before accepting it.
Keep a record of every payment and receipt, and never mix your parent's money with yours.
Why: Agents and guardians can be held responsible for misuse.
Check whether your parent qualifies for a senior property tax break or has unclaimed money.
Why: Many states offer senior exemptions, and older adults often have forgotten accounts.
Nothing extra here for your answers.
Deadlines
Signing a power of attorney
General rule: Only while your parent has capacity; after that a court process may be needed
Documents to gather
- Your parent's ID, Social Security and Medicare cards
- List of bank, retirement and investment accounts
- Income and benefit letters (Social Security, pension, VA)
- Insurance policies
- Deed, lease, car title
- Existing will, trust, power of attorney or health care directive
- Doctor's notes about memory or capacity, if any
Where to go
- FederalEldercare Locator (U.S. Administration for Community Living), 1-800-677-1116
Find local aging services and Adult Protective Services
- FederalCFPB: Managing someone else's money guides
Duties of agents, guardians, trustees and payees
- FederalSocial Security: representative payee program
Parent gets Social Security or SSI
- FederalVA fiduciary program
Parent gets VA benefits
- LocalCounty probate court
Guardianship or conservatorship
Costs
A power of attorney can be done with a state form for little cost (notary fees are small); a lawyer charges more. Guardianship/conservatorship involves court fees, sometimes a court-appointed lawyer or evaluator, and ongoing reports.
Talk to a lawyer if
- Your parent's capacity is in doubt
- Family members disagree
- There is a house, business or large savings
- You suspect financial abuse
- Guardianship or Medicaid long-term care planning is needed
Free help
Free legal help for older adults: your local Area Agency on Aging (through the Eldercare Locator, eldercare.acl.gov, 1-800-677-1116) can connect you to senior legal services. Legal Services Corporation (lsc.gov/about-lsc/what-legal-aid/i-need-legal-help) and LawHelp.org (lawhelp.org) list legal aid offices. The CFPB guides (consumerfinance.gov/consumer-tools/managing-someone-elses-money) are free.
Guides for your state
Choose your state above for direct links to its pages.
Questions
What is the signing a power of attorney?
Only while your parent has capacity; after that a court process may be needed
When should I talk to a lawyer?
Your parent's capacity is in doubt; Family members disagree; There is a house, business or large savings; You suspect financial abuse; Guardianship or Medicaid long-term care planning is needed.
How much does it cost?
A power of attorney can be done with a state form for little cost (notary fees are small); a lawyer charges more. Guardianship/conservatorship involves court fees, sometimes a court-appointed lawyer or evaluator, and ongoing reports.
Plans by state
This plan is the same in every state. Each state's RobinClaim page lists its courts, agencies and deadlines:
Sources
- CFPB: Guides for managing someone else's money
- Eldercare Locator (ACL)
- VA Fiduciary Program
- Legal Services Corporation: I need legal help
- CFPB: Help for representative payees and VA fiduciaries (a power of attorney does not give authority over federal benefits)
Plan checked Oct 2026. Independently fact-checked 2026-10-24. Some details could not be fully verified; see the notes in each section.
This plan is general legal information, not legal advice. RobinClaim is not a law firm. Laws and deadlines change and have exceptions: check with the official source or a lawyer or legal aid office about your own case. How we research.